WARNING: you are looking at the first line of a very lengthy post, written by an adult, about puppets. You may want to turn back now…
Look. We all have strong feelings about cherished childhood memories. Certain books and movies and toys gain a nostalgic glow over the years, hiding the truth that they were just stupid ways to keep kids amused.
Star Wars is a movie for kids, and it’s very stupid. But it might be very meaningful to you – a key part of (the story you tell yourself about) your childhood. “It was the first movie that made me want to tell my own stories“, or “It was the movie that made me want to learn more about space“, for example.
The Transformers are a bunch of toys that can either look like OBJECT A, or like a badly deformed robot with bits of OBJECT A sticking out of its head. They made a movie, based on toys, as a shameless way to sell more toys that Christmas. (“Kill off one character, then introduce at least three more… kids are gonna cry, but they’ll sure as shit want new toys from Santa!“) But maybe you’re a grown-up living in 2015 who still loves to collect and play with Transformers, because unlike most of the crappy action figures from that era, they moved and did things and were sometimes voiced by Eric Idle (or Orson Welles…) in a movie. That’s a pretty cool memory, right?
So let’s start with the obvious: the Muppets are a bunch of goddam sock puppets, and no sane adult should hold strong opinions about them, right? Read More